Twelve Tribes Experiences

I am back..........

2007-03-04T11:02:00.000-08:00

Hello to you all...

It has been a while since I post the blog. I just moved from Washington D.C. on January 25th to Yarmouth, Maine. I got new job working as an Adult Case Manager for mental health agency and I am doing so well..... and it is nice to be around my sisters and brothers here in Maine as well. I am enjoying be here in Maine as well but I miss living in Washington DC.

My sister, Samantha is on Honor Roll and she got all As in all her courses. I want to say that I am proud of her achievement in High School with no support of her parents but support of brothers and sisters around her. I believe she will do so well in future and she is smart girl.

I will be keep update my life and the community experiences as well.

For your information..

2007-01-06T22:51:00.000-08:00

Right now, I am in a tough situation and things are not looking good here in Washington DC with personal issues. I won't be able to post things till I get settled down and moving to Maine. I am looking forward to new life in Maine and get settled and then I will write more. I hope you are all doing well and keep intouch with me when you can. Thanks.

Races, Diversity and Culture in Twelve Tribes Community

2006-12-27T19:36:00.000-08:00

As I mentioned in previous blog about "Oppressions" I want to empthaize that there are oppressions within the races and cultures of different people who live in the community. There are black, Jewish, Hispanic, Chinese, Asians, and few other kind of people that live in the community. Actually I will speak more on black here tonight. As I have grew up in Island Pond. I have good friends who are black and live in the community. They are being oppressed because the teachings were taught that the Black are meant to be slaves and they are under the curse of God. They need to submit and serve the white and show that the White have more power than the black people. I have been angry with this because I still believe that the black people are to be treated equal like we do today. There are a lot of issues that the Black people have faced today in the world with oppressions and civil rights. I have classmates who was black and I was so close friend to her. I would have dream of marrying her. I told my parents one time that I really like her and wanted to marry her. They told me that white and black will not marry together, the black is to marry the person who is black and white is to marry the person who is white. I was growing up and have respected the black deeply because of my friend and I do not think of discriminate any black people. When my family moved to Rhode Island. It was first time that we live in neighborhoods where all black people live around. Usually the neighbors are not always safe and the nextdoors was scarcy experiences for my family when the city cops broken in the house to arrest the family who were involved in drugs. It was the most nightmares moments for my family, but it does not stop us from respecting the black people. Back to the community, about black. There are few black, only about 30 out of 2000 members in the community. It is very hard to understand why the community is being discriminate against the black people and their attitudes and their pride being black. I believe in each individuals and their dignity of pride in themselves. The community do not allow this and they suppress the people who are different to one mind, one things in common that required for the community members. There are a lot of things that the elders and Elbert Spriggs do not understand or respect the diversity, black and cultures of different members in the community. The culture means the values and traditions have been passed from generations to generations with one goal and established. I could explain better about culture but entering in dictionary is not working right online, will explain more about culture on next blog with my understanding from Diversity course I took in Gallaudet University. There are pretty diversity people in the community but there is lack of understanding the differences of cultures, diversity, and races in the community. I do respect the diversity more than the members in the community would show respect to them.

Reconsidering the Oppression Status in the Community...

2006-12-26T18:53:00.000-08:00

As I wrote earlier about "Oppression" within the community and outside in the world. I have been thinking about this for a while why are everyone being oppressed in the community with their behaviors, acting and their good or bad hearts. Everyone are totally different and have different way of their perspectives about life, belief, faiths, and religious. Let me share about the roles of Women and Men in the Twelve Tribes Community on my own perspectives and therefore, will share the Community's perspectives if I can do as well. For women, are meant to live and bearing their children, working in the houses, cleaning, laundry, cooking, caring for the children and spending time with their family and friends, go shopping for the community for foods and personal needs. Women work harder to keep the household cleaned and alive for the men and families to be home for the evenings and have a restful evenings or attending meetings or family nights. There are women who attending midwifery meetings, are teachers for children, and attending cooking meeting or government meetings. As for the women doing these things as normal inside the community, but the more women are expected to be submissive to husbands or authorities in the household. What kind of expectations they have for women to be treated like this even women do more than men and women are always home. There are actually 80% women cannot drive because the women are not allowed to drive. Women cannot lead the gathering, or teachings or the groups, only men can. The women usually can be leader for women only, unless have the strict hand authority of man over women. The women have spent hours labors and doing all things in the household that many men do not appreciate for them. It seems that women suffering with stress and oppressions in the community. Once the child is in trouble, it usually blames on the women not men. For men, the men go out and working odd job, or farm, or cottage industries that the community owns, and sometimes the household have one man to take care of the house, fixing and doing odd and evens jobs, and controlling the children when they are in school. Usually men are doing things easily than women do. Women work harder more than men do and usually the men do not make much money to support the household with foods. Supposed you live in the household with 40 people. How much money would it be cost for foods a week? I remember it was only $300 a week. It is so normal for one person to spend $150 to $200 a month outside the community. That mean the children do not have snack at all and have to be starve till the meals come, Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner. It is not easy life that everyone have lived and shortage of foods. You can notice that most members are not chubby, very skinny. The women usually give births at home, sometimes women are in health risk, but they are encouraged not to go to hospital for serious cases because the women are encouraged to have faith in God. I have to say that many women do have their babies died in the community. It was terrible because they hid from the government whereabout the cases occurred about the deaths of babies, names and birth/death certificates and burials. The community suppress the government from interfere within legal situations in the community. It is not what everyone seems to like or put themselves in risk with the legalize and the members inside the community. The children do not have full time education hours like public schools hours. The children are encouraged/forced to work half of the days to support the households. It is really dangerous how they do that with the children. So today, I have to say that everyone in the community are living in oppression society and the elders take pleasure of torture and abuse the members of the community. The oppressions is no longer necessary to face because we are living in the society where we better come to understand and show respect for diversity races. I will share more about Races, Diversity and Cultures in the community on next section. Good night.

Oppressions...

2006-12-25T21:00:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas to you!! Today, I have been thinking about the term "Oppression". I have thought of this a lot lately because last October 2006, my University (Gallaudet University), the students, faculty, staff and alumnus were protest against the new selected President of University to begin in January 2007, and there were a lot of debates about oppressions. In our society, the Deaf people are being oppressed and unable to speak up their concerning and opinions. Since I was Junior and Senior at Gallaudet University, I was heavily involved with Social Work Department, Social Work Board of Advisory Committee, Social Work Honor Society, and Social Work Club. I have voiced a lot of my own opinions like what should the Social Work Department do to better draw the students into major in Social Work, what encourage the students to study as pre-requirement, etc.. and all kind of different issues. It was a rich experiences for me to get involved. What does it mean to be oppressed in our society and especially what I and you have went through in the Twelve Tribes. Look at the definition of this term "Oppression"
1.the exercise of authority or power in a burdensome, cruel, or unjust manner.
2.an act or instance of oppressing.
3.the state of being oppressed.
4.the feeling of being heavily burdened, mentally or physically, by troubles, adverse conditions, anxiety, etc. Sure enough about this oppression because what I have went through in the Twelve Tribes Community. You will see what the oppressions really is inside the community. Women, Men, Children, Deaf, Disabilities. Why I say this...... because women are being oppressed in the Twelve Tribes Community. The women are not allowed to speak up their opinions, only women who husbands are elders or in governments can speak up.. Why not the women who is not part of governments or husbands who is not elders. What kind of attitudes is the Elders and Governments toward other people who do not share the equal opportunities like elders and governments. The Elders and Governments greatly mistreat the other people. Men are still be oppressed.... As in bible, it says that the Husbands, Father and Men are the Head of Wife and Family and Household. SO what does it stands to the Twelve Tribes Community? It is clearly that they abused the power of Men, husband and fathers and family!! Oppressions is greatly huge inside the Twelve Tribes Community because these people are living in place of submissiveness and like slaves to the Elders in the community. Women do have their voices, ideas and concerning than the Elders could care enough about. Look at my Mom, she has been living in the Community for very long time and she is wiser than these women who husbands are elders and my Mom could not do anything about the standards of life inside the community because my Dad is not an elder. (he used to be an elder before, but he was demoted by the enemy of young elders). In United States, Women, African Americans, Deaf, Blind and Hispanic and other races are being oppressed because most of majority in politics are WHITE! The white could be bigots and ignorance of the other races and immigrants. White are still thinking they are in the powers of world and it still is and how women are working so hard, Let me say, Women are FIGHTERS! To prove that the women are to be treated equal as men and races are to be treated in respect and equality as other races even the cultures are totally different. I can see that someday there will be women who will be U.S. President or Black President, or whatever in the United States, but I have to say that our society is not ready for it, nor our society is ready to allow gays be married, or our society is ready to allow women rule the United States. Honestly, I admire the women because the women are smart, caring and know what the best for the children and marriages, household, education, and health that men do not understand deeply. As I have say this, the Twelve Tribes Community still oppress the women, children and men that I do not need to tolerate this anymore because we are in the country of Freedom that we have to work hard to push the efforts that we no longer tolerate the oppressions or oppressions of religious. I can see that my Mom was oppressed, I can see my Dad is being oppressed and my parents are being controlled and judged by the elders in the community. Is it normal? NO! the judge is not for people to judge others, but the community are judging everyone everyday, the elders will be judged by God one day. The elders will be in greatly trouble and I lost my deep respect for those elders and these who are in government because they do not respect everyone and treat them with respect or equality but treat them with nasty attitudes and oppressions. I am so sick of this and I will never forget that moments that my parents, myself and my brothers and sisters and my precious friends were oppressed everyday and live to suffer whole life. Is that health? NO!! Not health.. I do not need to live in oppression society anymore and I am free to be who I am and I am proud of myself and I am proud of my brothers and sisters to recongnize the oppressions they have suffered in the community and proud of others who came out of the community to recognize they were oppressed. God does not need people to live in oppressions, GOD wants to see people live in peace, mind of peace and smile with joy and live health life. The life in the Twelve Tribes Community is not health and not health for everyone to live in oppressions or suffering severely. Sure I was severely oppressed all my life.. It will happen to come to end of the oppressions at right time at right place.

About my parents....

2006-12-18T17:51:00.000-08:00

I wanted to write about my parents.. I think it is good to give you the idea what the life in the community like for the Parents, family, and marriage life. I would start the story about my Dad and Mom. First, I share about my Mom. Well.. All I know about my Mom's background. She was 15 years old when she was pregnant with my half sister, Pam (who is 33). Her own family was poor and not well cared for each other as well. My mom's parents were very poor and they were getting older as my Mom was the last daughter of 8 children in her family. She was actually live in the house with other pregnant women who were waiting to give their births and then decide either to give away to adoptions or keep the babies. My mom ended up gave the birth and decided to give her up to adoption. Mom ended up joining the Community when she was only 15. She was sweet lost but had hope for something better in her life. She has lived in the community since she was 15 and has never leave or give up her life. She was determined. About my Dad. He went to Yale University. He was hippie lonely quiet man! He was hoping to seek something to satisfy himself. He went ahead and decided to fast for 40 days like Jesus Christ did. His parents were worried about him and thought he was going crazy. My grandparents took him to the hospital and he was in electronic shocks to change his mind and decisions. He was very depressed. Dad was close to graduate from Yale University, he decided to dropout and go on his own life. He left his parents' house in Ohio and walked for many days only carrying his peanut butter and bread and walked to other states to look for God. He ended up in Chattanooga, Tennessee where he met some down to earth hippie people and he was invited to stay at their place, the Vine House. He was attracted to the life in that community group. He ended up staying there and live for years. He and my Mom were interested in each other and they were getting married in July 10, 1977. It was one of the things I was surprised to learn that my mom did not intend to get his family, and relatives to her wedding but only their parents were invited to their wedding. Their wedding was usually like wedding-tradition in our world society, but was held inside the restaurant. My parents were giving births to me, Magdalene, Adam, Tessie, Ben, Samantha and Mivnah for 17 years. Now I am 28 and Mivnah as my last sister is only 11 years old My parents are currently in their middle age in 50's. Life has been changing since marriage, having children, the children getting older and children living somewhere apart from family and parents. It was amazing to see how things has changed since childhood to adulthood in my family. Their marriage has been up and down. As my childhood, my parents were going through up and down because they have big family and children to take care. As recently I visited my parents last summer, they are getting older and very relaxing and more romance and loving each other. It was very interesting to see how things have changed in parents. The family tradition in the Twelve Tribes Community is very different than American Family Tradition as well, because the family live with other families and other single people, working together, getting up and go bed together (not the same room together). Marriages is very different in the community, usually the parents have their own times every week or every other week and the other adults to take care of their children while the parents having their private time together. It is call "family night". I usually hate the family night because I had to be with someone to look after me and the person can either be harsh or mean to me and would not let me do things I want to do. I guess I do not miss my childhood experiences because it was very hard to be in these situation that every child have gone through in the community. My parents have been living in the community for more than 35 years and they are still there, but most of their children are not in the community anymore. Only two daughters are still in the community. I wondered how they are feeling about this. I could imagine that they feel guilty that they did not do enough or discipline their own children enough like they were supposed to. I have to say that they do not and they have done their best to raise me and my brothers and sisters as they should be and they have their lives to chose and to success with their lives even inside the community or outside the community. I do believe that my brothers and sisters have been going through tough times in the community like me as well, but they are doing well and are strong and become stronger people. I am proud of them no matter what even still in community or not.

Merry Christmas! Happy Holidays!

2006-12-17T17:43:00.000-08:00

My apologize for not posting anything for a while. I have been busy lately and been looking for new job. It is likely that I will get a new job very soon and that will mean moving to other state from Washington D.C. I will let you know as soon I get the final formal offer. Smile. As you know that Christmas and New Year holidays are coming. It is probably one of happiest days I would enjoy or could be sad days for one of you. Who knows! I think I could use both happy and sad days for me. What is Happy things I like about Holidays... I enjoy the Christmas so much that we have the family and friends get together and sharing the meals, gifts and playing games and other activities as a family or friends. It is one of the cherish feeling that I love and I only started celebrate the Christmas in 1999 after I left the Twelve Tribes. I think it was probably hard at first but then I loved it the more and get to decorate the house and sharing the Christmas with my friends or relatives. I actually went for Christmas in Chattanooga, Tenn with my aunt or cousins. It was wonderful experiences as well. The Twelve Tribes Community do not believe in celebrate the Christmas or New Years. It is very similiar to Jehovah's Witness which they do not celebrate the holidays as well. The other day, I watched a movie "Passion for Christ". It touched me deeply, not only that I completely reject the bible that I was taught in the Twelve Tribes Community with the New Testament Bible about Jesus Christ. It is very clear to me that most of world know about Jesus Christ and how he was the Son of God, and all things that He has gone through for everyone who sins has been covered by the blood of Jesus Christ. It is very clearly that how it is realistic that Jesus Christ was born and filled with the Joy that He was the King of Jewish. (no offense to Jewish). But as otherwise, I think the Twelve Tribes Community is totally blind to see what the truth is about Jesus Christ as I have learned more and more about who Jesus Christ is in the churches I have attended since I left the TT. Ok, other subject, what is sad about this holidays.. not everyone in the family are being able to get together and share the Christmas together like my parents and brothers and sisters. They are always in my mind and my heart on Christmas Day and New Year and wish them the best for their new year and their goals to be established. It is one of good things to go through together and know that we have a rough year that came to the end with happiness or sadness, but do not let the Christmas Holidays stop you from enjoying yourself. You are welcome to come and visit me with my opening arms for you once you are feeling lonely or sad, or none to share with you. Let me know... I wanted you to have a wonderful Holidays ahead of you!! I love you all!

More on "Cult"

2006-11-17T18:33:00.000-08:00

You might wonder why the Twelve Tribes members believe they are not part of a "cult". There are many reasons that I strongly believe the TT is a cult. First of all, what the TT perspectives of why they are not a cult. Ok... when they started the community in Chattanooga, Tennessee in 70's. It was a time where the young people came to the place after the Vietnam war and they seek for social justice, peace and love in the world, not the war. The young people involved in shows like Woodstock, Grateful Dead shows, and Flower Children, Jesus Movements, and others where the young people involved in drugs and suicide and aids has rised in young people. The young people left their families and became hippies and lived in the different groups, different cults, different religious groups. Gene Spriggs was one of it, he was at Jesus Movement and felt that God called him to start the group of his own. It was where it started in Chattanooga, Tennessee and had the house, Vine House where few young people joined and started the Yellow Deli restaurants in south. They did attend the churches but stopped go to the churches because they accused Gene Spriggs for different perspectives, and different doctrines within the community. There were oppressions between the churches and the members of the TT. They ended up moved to Island Pond, Vermont. The church opened up homes for the members in Island Pond. They formed a community calls "Northeast Kindgom Community" ( correct me if I am missing something). It became more obviously how the TT is formed inside the homes with the members and children. It is similar to the Davidian Koresh in Waco.... The community believe they are set apart from the religions, and Christianity. They still use the verses in bible like Christians do. They preach, like Christians do, they pray, sing, and dance like Christians do. They are follow the similar lifestyle of Christianity religion. They always argue they are not part of any religious or Christianity. They said that Christianity are hypricote and do not please God at all. They are part of go to Hell.. The TT members believe that they are the ONLY God's Children on the earth that will rule the whole world when the world comes to end in 50 years. Do you or I believe this? NO!!! IMPOSSIBLE! because they have follow the verses in the bible and how they have the visions or revelations on the world coming to the end. Now my perspective apart from my growing up in the TT and since I been out of the TT for 7 years. After a lot of deep understanding, been involved in different groups even some churches or Christian groups at college. I have learned more about the lifestyle, reading books and talked or watch the programs on TV of some people shared their experiences living in the Cults. It is clear to me that the Twelve Tribes is really a cult, why?? ONE LEADER!, controlling, brainwashed, living in fears, abuses, follow so many rules that is not necessary. There are so much that I could share but I think the other story in this blog has explained what my experience like in the TT with abuses and cult. I am sick of how Gene Spriggs has been establishing this and has been creating so many thousands teachings. I feel that he was self-annointed glory man that seeks to be in Heaven with Jesus Christ. He has so many faults inside himself!! I do not care about him anymore. When I saw Gene Spriggs here in Washington D.C. on July 4th in 2004, he was so cold to me and not say "Hi" or anything to me. How is that kind of man like this representing to the TT members and to Ex members. I have given the thoughts of this man after see his behavior towards me. Is that the way he acting like Jesus Christ, rejecting me for leaving the TT community? NO! Jesus Christ will always reach out to anyone and he represents the LOVE for the humans on the EARTH! that mean not the TT community itself. It has an evidence that the TT is not the way Jesus Christ would represents for the whole world. I have to say that the TT do not understand about Life, Religious, and LOVES! It is very sad how they are being taught to live like that and be brainwashed.

Cult vs Community

2006-11-16T21:15:00.000-08:00

There are many ideas if the Twelve Tribes is really a "cult" or "non-cult". I have believed before that it was not a cult but there are many definition of what "cult" really mean... I have looked at dictionary.. And here are
1.a particular system of religious worship, esp. with reference to its rites and ceremonies.
2.an instance of great veneration of a person, ideal, or thing, esp. as manifested by a body of admirers: the physical fitness cult.
3.the object of such devotion.
4.a group or sect bound together by veneration of the same thing, person, ideal, etc.
5.Sociology. a group having a sacred ideology and a set of rites centering around their sacred symbols.
6.a religion or sect considered to be false, unorthodox, or extremist, with members often living outside of conventional society under the direction of a charismatic leader.
7.the members of such a religion or sect.
8.any system for treating human sickness that originated by a person usually claiming to have sole insight into the nature of disease, and that employs methods regarded as unorthodox or unscientific. Âadjective
9.of or pertaining to a cult.
10.of, for, or attracting a small group of devotees: a cult movie. Those definition of "cult" is very clear evidence of the Twelve Tribes Community. The members of TT do not believe they are "cult" because they are set apart from the religious and apart from all the ideology and religions in the world. It is not TRUE!! because they have a Leader, who said, he is appointed by God to lead and establish the group that are Jesus Christ's People, not Christianity, not Catholic, etc.. I have looked at this dictionary "cult".. It is very true that the Twelve Tribes is a cult.. because LOOK at this!! The TT is small number, about 3 thousands or less members in whole world that is one religion calls TT. The TT have ONE LEADER, whose name is Elbert "Gene" Spriggs who controls all the bodies of the TT community, and all places, houses, his own money from everyone, The community members are being taught to have ONE MIND, ONE HEART, and Same FAITH, same believe, all kind of expectations of everyone.... EVERYONE are being taught to live in FEARS of GOD to be sinless.. is that possible? IMPOSSIBLE!!!!!! Everyone are expected to be PURE, PERFECT people! Is that possible? IMPOSSIBLE!!!!! Look at Jesus Christ, he died for your sins, my sins and everyone's sins so that we do not have to face theconclusionss of suffering in the death with guilty of our sins.. We still have SINS and we have to live with it for rest of our lives even we ask God for forgiveness.. He will always and have always forgive us even we have FAITH in GOD...Wee will live to be the happy people on the earth.. I have to say that the Twelve Tribes is a "cult" because they damaged everyone's lives to be the follower of Leader in the community...

History of Abuses in Twelve Tribes...

2006-11-16T20:08:00.000-08:00

There are a lot of things that people are not aware of the abuses inside the homes of Twelve Tribes.. People who are visiting from outside inside the houses of the community but do not know what it is like in closed door rooms that the members of community live. There are millions of things that you do not know what is going on inside the community.. There are a lot of secrets that I believe I should share... In June 22, 1984 state of Vermont sent police, social workers and others to go to 12 households in Island Pond, Vermont to seize the children from the community and parents. They came to the houses at 5 am and ordered the children to get dressed and get in school buses. The parents were not willing to let go of their own children. The Parents and children together walked to the school buses to the town, calls "Newport, Vermont" where there is a court building and we all stayed in the gym next to the court awaiting for the judges or social workers to interview or talk to the children or parents. It has been all day long in that gym. I was 6 years old when the police came to my house, Branch House and I was told that I led the police around the house like a little innoncent boy do not know what is happening with the community. I guess I was not shy of the police at all. It is funny thou. My Dad was in the block building teaching in the morning and Mom and I, my sister and my baby brother were at home when the police came to the house. Dad later met us and joined with us somewhere I do not remember either leave the House or meet in gym. Mom was so afraid and did not know what to do, but she took me, Magdalene and Adam all ready and walked us to the school bus and waited with Mom and rode on the way to Newport. There were the 110 children seized from the community include all the parents. For the years after that happened, I started to come to understand more and more about why the state of Vermont had raided on the community upon te abuses that the children were getting and how the state got reports/complaints from the residents of town of how the children were getting beating, and using of the rods/paddles to discipline the children. The children do not go to public school and concerning over the lack of education on the children. All kind of issues. The community had won the judge's heart to return all children back to the parents and homes. I was like why the hell that I had gone through like this and I did wished that the state could do something more on the children in the community, like forcing the community that the children must go to public schools or be provided of their curriculum programs to educate the children within like one-room schoolhouse. There are pretty so much damages that go beyond between the community and the State Government of Vermont. The community did a lot of things to hide from the state over what they were doing with education and children. I have grew up seeing so much hypricote within the community with dishonesty, hiding and defend themselves from the government in Vermont. I would think of accusing the state of Vermont for not doing enough and lack of "watchdog" over the community in Island Pond, and several other communities in some towns in Vermont. The community are continue their celebrations of June 22, 1984 to remember how the judge has release the case and dismissed the state of Vermont for violating the constitution and freedom of religion. There are positive and negative perspectives that I see about the Twelve Tribes vs. State of Vermont. Positive of State of Vermont is to protect the interest of the Children, Interest of the education for the community, Interest of the Families Welfare, Health, and environments. Negative of community, they avoid the State of Vermont to involve, reject of accepting their responsible to follow the laws, failing to provide the best of education for the children. There are 70% children who were born and raised in the community do not get education, just forced child labors, getting married and have their own families. They do not write or do math well. The community do not provide the children high school levels of education, only up to 8th grade.
There are children who work involved chainsaws, woodshops with the machines, farms, farm machine equipments, bakery with machine equipments, restaurant with machine equipments, candle shop with 300F HOT POT to melt the wax for making candles, the chemical and heat are dangerous for the children to work around, soap shop using the same heat pots, chemicals, rarely wear the mask or protections. carried the heavy over 100 pounds of boxes, supplies from streets to streets during school hours. It is very dangerous how the community forced the children to do child labors within around the machines. I could not or hate to do these. I did not want to cut my fingers or hands from working around the machines. I do not believe that my own future children should experience that I have experienced in the community. I want my children to get education, have good time, playing sports and social with their friends and have a good time with family. That is what I strongly believe in this instead of child labors and no childhood fun experiences like I have missed for most of my life in the community. The children do not deserve this kind that I and other children have went through. It is not safe! I believe in safety for the children.

Child Abuses in Twelve Tribes.

2006-11-14T16:40:00.000-08:00

There are the times that ex-members or members of the community believe that the children were not abused. Physcially, mentally, emotionally and spiritually..... The truth from my own experiences living in the community I was abused! The children were abused in the community for many thousands reasons. The community have been very opinionate on how the parents were raising the children within the elders and governments in the community. I have to say that each families do not have the privacy as it supposed to be for each families. One day, when I was 12 years old. My parents were sent away on tours (Grateful Dead shows). I was staying with someone watching over me. There is a time that I was getting angry for being corrected of my behavior, the person was restraint me and spanked my face, took all my clothes off and beat me up badly and putted me in cold shower. I was very outraged of this situation that I became uncontrollable keeping getting out of everyone from restraint me. There were 4 adults sat on me on the floor. I could not even breath, I had blue face and body started to faded and I was not moving. Few adults putted me in cold shower with my clothes on. I was so UPSET about this! I could not wait for my parents to come home. I was crying everynight praying that my parents be home soon as possible because I hated being with other people who are being abusive on me that my parents do not do on me. It was not right! I was so mad and could still REMEMBER this situations today from many years ago. I guess it has been putting me to scars for years of my miserable life that I was with other adults while my parents were away. I strongly believe that each child that are living or raised in the community was abused. I have to say that the community always have many rules for the children and teenagers to make their lives miersable and suffering more than adults. The children are innoncent and they do not deserve to live this kind of suffering in the community. I believe that I was abused! Within my issues on being deaf, boy and independent mind guy. I am not letting this going to stop me from moving on with my life. I did not want to get married or raising my own children in the community because I do not believe that my own children need to experience what I had experienced in the community and they need to live their lives better, places, and better education that the community have failed to protect their own children from all harms. There are many children who are phyiscally damaged like cutting off their fingers, or hands or blind, or other things that they were involved with machines. There are laws that are against the Child Labors, but the community are still using the children to child labors and taking advantages of the children to work and making money for the community. I OPPOSE this! Because the children are small, and need education and be in safe environment. The community never meant to provide the safety environment for the children at all. They risked so many dangers out around inside the community. I have been traumatized from the experiences of abuses that I have and other children are too. I could not forget the every moments of times I have been punished or doing things that got me in troubles. I could not believe how much the children and myself have went through an exteme times of abuses in the community. There are 20% of children being taken away from parents and live with other adults. Is this ridiculous? Yes! Sad! I have to say it is very wrong how the children are being taken away from the parents. It is abusive of parents' authorities for families itself. My parents are being abused on authority over parents over the children. It is not right. There are a lot of lists I can share about all kind of abuses that occurred inside the community, more of sexuality that happened to the children as well not well explored around within the sexual between children and adults. I believe there are few who had experienced those. I am very grateful that I am free from the community and I do not have to raise my future children inside the community and to see my own children have to suffer that I have suffered in the past. My brothers and sisters are saying that they have and are against the community for the way my family was treated and abused. I do not blame the children because they do not deserve this kind of abuses that they happened to experience in the community.

My family....

2006-11-13T16:50:00.000-08:00

Want to know what is going on with my family? This is very interesting..... and I am happy and sad about my family.. When my family - my parents, Adam, Abshalom (Ben), Tesumet (Tess), Tsemayah (Samantha), and Mivnah were living in Missouri and moved to Colorado. There were a lot of situations that happened to my family. My mom was not happy living in Colorado, but she loves the weather and state there in Colorado but inside the community was pretty ugly when the people were being so harsh and make judgments about my family, the behaviors of my brothers and sisters as teenagers and how there were out of control within the children. I do not think it is a big deal because the children are just children, teenagers are just teenagers. I think the governments, elders and leaders in the community are very harsh and mean to the families with the teenagers. I just am blame Andrew Lamb for mistreated my family hugely. I lost my respect for him because he has been treating my family awful and his own children were spoiled brats! His own children accused against my family. And I think Andrew Lamb is just too blind to see his own problem within his own family. Just outlook at others problem and get the families involved to have the problems, not his own family. I hate that! I feel it is not respecting for others as his own and his own family problem. I have to admit that I am sick of Andrew Lamb as well for how he has been treating my family. My family was asked to leave the community and also my own Mom was asked to leave. My father was willing to leave to be with the family. I was very shocked! I could not understand about this and I felt that it was not right how my family was treated. I think Andrew Lamb and his family has to leave the community too for not disciplining his own children well. My family ended up rented a mini van and drove around some in West and then to Chattanooga Tennessee and then visited me in Washington D.C. and we all were camping together. My family ended up move to Maine. My parents were not given any of money to help with starting new life in Maine and they were also not given the car to live functional as well. That is why my family went to Maine and had my aunt do everything for them, getting them to start with buying new car and rent a house for the family. It hurts me so MUCH!! Why would the community in Colorado treated like that to my family. I do not like how it was in the community. My family was living and stay out from the community for a whole year. Adam, Dad and Ben worked on some odd jobs around in several states and made some money. Life was beautiful and good for the family. Tess and Samantha got to do some jobs making money. My mom was working at Daycare Center. She seems so happy and comfortable and enjoyed her moments living in the house. It is so hard to see that my parents went back to the community few weeks ago after being away for a year. I could not imagine my own Mom being back and be sad, be miserable living in the community again without her children around, only her last daughter, Mivnah who is only 11 years old. I have a huge feeling that someday Mivnah will leaves. Samantha is just 14 years old. She started to go to High School, Yarmouth High School in Yarmouth, Maine. She is doing so well and success in school. Joined in cross country and other sport activities. I am so PROUD Of her.. she was brave and fought so hard to get her parents to let her go to high school. I know she will make it all through. I hope someday Mivnah will leaves and I will be so happy for her and she can go to school and that mean my family will get all opportunities for education. Tess and Ben will start go to college in January 2007.. I am so proud of them. I know it is so hard for my parents. I believe there will be a time they will realize that.. I want to be there for my family and help them to success in their future. About Adam.. He is on his own and has his own business.. You can ask him! Smile...

Struggling with Life, Struggling with Spiritually?

2006-11-06T16:03:00.000-08:00

How many of you, ex-members are and have struggling with the life outside the community? How many of you are angry with God? How many of you are bitter against the community? There are so many questions I can ask you all but for now, these three questions I just put above is enough to start and we will go more deeper. I hope you are attracted to have discussions with me and others. Please do not be afraid to open your discussion because it will help you to realize that there are so much we need to speak from our thoughts, our feeling, our fears, our frustrations, our depressions, and all other things that we need to work things out inside our feeling, our hearts and our minds. I am not going to sound like I am a community member and follow their teaching. I believe that the community teachings do not allow you to open your heart, your mind, your feelings, and fears. It is because Yoneq taught us to live in fears for God. Will you be allowed to be afraid of God? I do not believe in this because there are and were so much insecurities that we have lived in the Twelve Tribes Community. Everyone do not have happy smiles or look exciting. They are just living their rituals lives like getting up at 5 am, and go for a walk to pray to God, reading bibles and get dressed and go to the gathering at 6 am and then breakfast, then work and lunch and work then gathering again for evening and dinner and then bedtime or meetings. What kind of life is that for families? The Family tradition is totally damaged because everyone do not have privacy lives within the household. There are so much we have went through in the community. I think it is so common that we have get used to this all the times till we are getting old and tired of this lifestyle rituals. It is because everyone are in fears! Everyone do not know what they were chose to live or believe. It is hard to imagine yourself, once you were at Grateful Dead Shows, or Phish concerts, or Woodstocks, looking for love, peaces and justice in the World. There you felt the love that you have been drawn from the members of Twelve Tribes and easily join in the community and living your life in the community. Does that sounds easy for the younger people who are drop out of high schools or colleges. There is eventually families that were growing up in the community for years and the parents have left the community with their own children, some decided to stay or return. It is hard to understand what we all have gone through living in the community, or outside the community in the world. I have found myself feeling so totally different from being around the ex-members. There are times that they would talk about their experiences living in the community, how much the damages the elders/leaders did to their children, how the children have been struggling with nightmares, struggling with education in public schools or colleges and dropped out and got involved in drugs. I would recommend you to sit down and put your deep thoughts on things that you have gone through both positive and negative in your past and present life from community to outside. Think of how good life is good, how hard it is. And think of how you can make things better for yourself, think of how to reach to others and show your loves and be full of lights to the community, put them in darkness because what you are doing is truth and you have reveal yourself that you have and what you have. I am not bitter against God, I am not bitter against the community. I have not chose to live in the community. I was born and raised. There was something I do not believe in the community beliefs/religion. Everyone do all struggle with their lives. I have and am still struggling with my life even outside the community. But there will be good things coming to you one day. I have a strong faith in myself that once I do good, I will be rewarded for doing good. Life is short! You got to think of something positive to experience in your life, like traveling, go bar/clubs, or church, or social activities, doing community services, participating in your children's activities in school and sports. You will get the self-esteem to grow. Why not do that? Lets talk about this. I think it is important for you to come out and start something and you will not have to live with negativity feelings that you have from living in the community.

5 things....

2006-11-05T19:08:00.000-08:00

Wondering what are 5 things? Well, there were 5 things that happened to me within one year, October 1999 to October 2000. First thing, I left the Twelve Tribes..... Second things, I went to school in January 2000, and third things, I felt that I was in another cult group "Jehovahs Witness" and went to several different churches to see what it is like there in churches different from the Twelve Tribes, Forth things, I went to Gallaudet University, a new different life and educational environment for me, and the last thing I faced the most horrible experiences living in the dorm at Gallaudet University, one student got murdered in the next dorm of mine. We were all freshman... I could not believe what I have gone through so much in my life. It made me realize that it was God's plans that I go through all these things in my life. Sure enough, it made me a strong man with strong understanding and faith in myself and knowing that I am doing things right and the Twelve Tribes are saying that world is full of evil and it is very dangerous out in the world. I have to disagree with this because there are so many diverse, races, cultures, and religions all over the world. None will come to one place like the Twelve Tribes thinks they are meant to be in one place together. It is impossible and Twelve Tribes is so WRONG! They do not really respect the diverse, such black people, deaf people, handicap people, and other kind of people. I have to admit that I was not taught in loving other people. The Twelve Tribes community believes they know what love is about. I feel that I was never loved because I was looked down all the times. How can people understand what love is about. It is hard to explain what love is about because I strongly believe none will understand till you have your own vision to understand about faith and love and there you will grow to love the person, creations, and animals no matter what. Like I have two dogs at first I was not comfortable with them because they were just animals but as I live with them and they live with me and the longer we are together, we are showing our unconditional love for each other. They are comfortable with me and I am comfortable with them, it is something it has and has to be developed in you to really love what you have. Will talk more about the love apart from my own understanding and the Twelve Tribes community perspective. I have LOVED my life so much after I went through all these 5 things and it shows me how we are just all human beings with dignity of respecting. It is well worth to experience these and learn from them.

Twelve Tribes Experiences: Gallaudet University

2006-11-03T05:42:00.000-08:00

Twelve Tribes Experiences: Gallaudet University

Gallaudet University

2006-11-02T18:50:00.000-08:00

It was close to the beginning that I have to start looking into go to college. I have decided it was time for me to go to college. My Vocational Rehabiliation Counselor encouraged me to start apply for Gallaudet University, as it was one of the places I wanted to attend. I only had 7 months with Professional Learning Center in New York and then in June, I applied to Gallaudet University. I was so ready and looking forward to new life, new experiences and new enviornment of Education and College Life. Few weeks later, on July 4th, I was at Dante's House for 4th of July with ex-members. Maggie Mehr came with my letter from Gallaudet University. I opened very nervous. I read and it said "Congratulations, on your future to be a student at Gallaudet University as a freshman." I jumped with joy and shared with everyone. They were so happy for me and I danced. It was so unbelievable for me to imagine myself going to college even I have never visit or touch Gallaudet University myself. I was so ready and decided to drop off going to PLC and passed my driving road exam and got license and went shopping and packed and ready to go to Gallaudet University for New Student Orientation Week in August, a week before officially start school. Bill Mehr was dropping me off to Gallaudet University. I was very nervous and happy. We left the night before the First day of NSO week and stayed at hotel. We woke up early in the morning and drove to Gallaudet University, went to Department of Public and Safe (Police Dept) and get the new ID card with photo and number. We walked up to dorm and got the key and paperworks done and found a room for me to move in. I was very uncomfortable about the dorm enviornment and their system. I feel so weird about dorm style because I am so used to grow up as a home person style, my room, my bed, my foods, my bathroom. I had to share my dorm with one roommate. I had to share shower and bathroom with my whole floor of boys. I felt so weird and so different. I was scared! All those new students were interesting, snob, too young for me. I had to deal with this. I tried my best to be patient and adjust to this lifestyle at Gallaudet University and dorms. I met my new roommate and there is a bit of uncomfort about each other. I somehow ended up moving to 4th floor with a new roommate that I have met the other day later on. It was much better haha.....When Bill and I were done with moving my stuffs to the dorm, we went to eat breakfast at cafeteria and met some new people, and then went to the Chapel Hall building to register and do all kind of paperworks, etc for financial aids, health insurances, my VR counselor, my parents, my name, all kind of information. Bill Mehr had to leave to go meet his wife and kids to go to Florida for vacation. I was left alone and it was so hard and not comfortable for me. I tried to get adjust to living situation at dorm, and meeting people. At evening, there were called for all freshman to get together for ceremony, then met with a group counselor to help with getting adjusted to Gallaudet University. I just started becoming involved and joined in activities. It was a lot better and had fun. I started to feel better and tried to be assertive to meet people and do things I can do. I somehow met some nice students and formed into group and worked on things together. It was nice. We had to get up on Monday and take English exam, then on Tuesday, take Math exam, then on Wednesday, went to meeting about academic, what to start taking courses, what to decide about picking major, all kind and I had an academic counselor. I then had to meet with someone to inform me my score of English and Math exams and what courses I should take. I found that my English was not that bad but had to take non-credit course related to reading. I accepted that. And Math was lowest score! I am not surprised! i knew my math was weak..... On Thursday, I met with my academic counselor and registered for 4 classes. It was just a starting. Then on Friday I registered for all my courses and got approved. That was all for the week and start of the weekend came, went out with friends and tour around some places in DC city and went out to restaurant. That was pretty easy week and getting ready for officially courses on Monday. Wow! I made it through, i was not comfortable for few first days, but got adjusted and used to it and then started having classes, met with professors and made new friends with students in my classes. It was all great! I enjoyed it so much and can understand their ASL/English sign language. Gallaudet University is World's Most Only Liberal Art University for the Deaf. There were alot of deaf people come to Gallaudet from other countries. I am and will always be proud of Gallaudet University as well i am now an alumni of Gallaudet University of 2005.

Education....

2006-10-30T16:34:00.000-08:00

I want to share about education. It has been a very deep roots of education in me, my family, relatives eventually my Father, Grandma and cousins and aunts. I always have been very interested in education for many years even though I was deaf and it should mean to the community that I could not learn or have chance to write or communicate. It was a pretty frustrating childhood for me in the community as homschooling. Education system in the Twelve Tribes was very poor and weak and hard to be able to gather all kind of subjects to learn as educational opportunities for the children. The children were not really given much opportunity with education. They do not believe that the children really need much knowledge of educations that we, the parents and people who joined in the community had in public schools and colleges, etc. The children do not have high school education, just up to 8th grades, almost similar to Amish Community with school system. There are pretty good laws in United States over Education for the children and the Twelve Tribes do not follow it. They believed that Education could have fulfilling the dreams in children for outside the community such geography, American History, Government History, World Civilization, Biology/Science and pretty much other subjects that children could have gotten the rich experiences in education. I just wished I got it all and went to Deaf school during my childhood. It was just like a dream that has comes true for me to enter in University. Today, many children left the community are struggling with their education in public/private schools and Colleges and some have quit/drop out. I blamed the Twelve Tribes for poor provision on education for the children who were raised and are raising in the community. I just wished that they do something to provide the best for the children, but sadly the community use the children as child labors to make for living for the community with house, bills and foods. The foods were poorly provided everyday to everyone and children in the community. I could not believe how much I have gone through for 21 years in the community. How much things have happened in my life, it could be very frustrating, traumatic, depressions, oppressions, treat the children like they are worthless and not loved. I have always been going through a lot of painful experiences growing up in the Twelve Tribes, not only the most painful, I have some positive experiences, such as my lovely family with 4 sisters and two brothers in my family as I am the oldest. They were close family together. My father is smart and have a lot of talents in him and he has provided a lot of intelligence in my family which I was proud of this, to show how smart I am and as growing up, I was always a good rebellious youth.
As talking about education! I had to take GED to enter in college. I have always dreamed of go to Gallaudet University, the WorldÂs Most Liberal Art Education for the Deaf University. It has came true that I entered in Gallaudet University in Fall 2000. Before talking about go to Gallaudet University. My Vocational Rehabilitation Counselor sent me to a small program school that calls ÂProfessional Learning CenterÂ I started went to that school, it was not a great place to attend because all students were low function, and not very smart students and have a lot of patient to work with. I was just going there to take my GED. I started in January 2000 and it was overwhelming for me at first because I am new to the school system totally different from growing up at homeschool in the community. I stayed there for 7 months and it was not always successful there because the people that work there are JehovahÂs Witness. I felt that I am in other cult group. What a strange feeling that I was there, but it was a learning experience for me and I do not completely reject them for their religious belief. More to come on Education on next blog.

Newburgh, New York......

2006-10-29T09:47:00.000-08:00

I was staying with Bill and Maggie Mehr at their house. They have 4 lovely children. I have known this family for many years. They used to live in the community in Island Pond at Arbor House with my family. Bill and Maggie were close friends with my parents and family. Bill knows a lot about me and he knows what I will be happy/success with the future. He knows all the pain that I have suffered in the community. I was staying at Bill's house and I do not have any money or anything to start with. It was little bit scarce and not sure what will happen. Bill was doing all works for me and explained to me about many things that I have to face in real world. How to cope being around people who are different, have their own opinions and watching television, being on computer and using internet, and how to dress and accept the foods that they use. Totally different experiences than the experiences in the community. I tend to be go by with judgment and go with what I need to believe and follow the truth in my heart, but somehow I was immersed into things that go on in daily life outside the community. It was hard and scared at first but I became more and more comfortable with what I was doing and trying to get into my life and be determine for the future. Bill has helped me get in Social Security Income and went to meet with the State Vocational Rehabiliation Counselor to see about assisting me with education and job. Few days after I left the community, I have met with VR Counselor and she was shock about my life experience in the community. She was willing to do all things to get me started. I was very excited and looked forward to it. I eventually started go to school in January, 2 months later after left the community. I was visiting several ex-members, some relatives and friends during the Holidays. It was little bit difficult because I did not have the money to do things but I got some pretty enough to start with. They were very supportive of me and were happy that I left the community. Bill and Maggie were supportive of me and they can sign in sign language to communicate with me and it was easy to communicate which I was grateful for.

The Day I was Leaving.....

2006-10-28T20:22:00.000-07:00

The day I was leaving the community was scared and happy but emotional and confused. I was somewhat lost and not sure what will happen next, and next then there. I was packing my stuffs and left behind a lot of my things. I only get my backpack with some value and important things and I had some left in the Cafe's basement. I was walking out of the house, White House... And few people came to me and talked to me. They tried to encourage me to change my mid that told me that I am to represent for the Deaf people in the world to join in the community. I have doubt that. I no longer want to think about it. I was walking down the street to downtown. My father was following me and sure enough, he was upset and depressed. He knew that he can't stop me and he was trying so hard to convince me in all of his power to have my mind changed and to change. I explained to him all of these things I have suffered in the past in the community. My father said he felt it was his responsible about how he was raising me in the community. I was having tears in my eyes but I know that I need to go on with my life and see where the reality I have longed for many years to come into realistic. I kept wondering what will happen to Yohannah and Shoshannah. I feared so much what will happen to them. I was kindly offered my help to their father to take the girls with me and I will do all things to make sure the girls are safe and happy, but it did not happen. I wondered for the whole time what is and will go to happen to the girls. I was walking away and Dad was leaving me alone and walked away and he was not happy about it. I just walked and I was trying to figure what to do. I have a nice thought, I know someone in the town name Billy. He used to live in the community but left for years. I knew that he was willing to do what I need. I walked to his house and knocked. He was there and I asked him if he is willing to help me to call Bill Mehr. He was calling Bill Mehr and his wife answered and was saying that Bill Mehr was in New Hamsphire visiting with Dante and Janet. I was thrilled and Bill said he was waiting to get and pick me up to leave the community. I was very relieved. I waited for an hour till Bill arrives. When Bill arrived, he was talking to Billy for few hours and then took me and went to get my things and left to go on highway off to his house in Newburgh, New York. I was scared and very happy to see Bill and I felt so comfortable that people were so willing to help me whenever I need and to have new life. Bill and I arrived after late midnight to his house and we started talk about what has happened with me and the girls and the community. I was so freak scared and He asked me what I wanted to do. I told him that I wanted to go college and get education and have new life. I was very determine to set this goals and I do not want it to stop me or I would falling to go back to the community where life is pretty miserable in the community. I can tell that day was the Day of happiness and scared. But I made it through and I know that I had supports which were important for me.

Bellows Falls, Vermont

2006-10-28T10:09:00.000-07:00

After that I was in locked in the room, my Dad came to visit from Coxsackie, New York. I was living alone in Bellows Falls since I was an adult and on my own. My Dad was convincing me to change my mind and told me all that I need to repent and change my heart. It really annoyed me and he pressured me so much the whole time. It was really hard and I had a lot of anger inside myself. I no longer tolerate this and no longer want to go on with my life in the community. I was very determine to have education and new life outside the community. It was so hard for me........ There the next day, I was in the meeting with elders and Yohannah, Shoshannah and our Dads. It was very emotional and hard... They have questioned us about why we did this and why we wanted to leave, and all kind of questions. At the end, I became more frustrated and more anger. The girls were very nice and supportive of me. They have been already determine to leave and no doubts. I had no doubts. I was so Ready.... Why the earth elders tried to stop me and change my mind? I do not understand.... Are they being selfish? Avoid to look bad on them? Well, I did make them LOOK BAD!! How??? I stood up in the meeting and accused them for being abusive and manipulation the Children in the community. Our children have suffered and it is enough. I yelled at them that the girls (Shoshannah and Yohannah) were severely abused and I have done all my best to protect them and befriend with them. I know they love and appreciate me very much. The girls were smiling and said "Yes, you are RIGHT! I agree with you." I was become stronger and I was very tough about this. The elders were looking scared and not know what to do or to say. I have said I am leaving. They told me, you can go, but you cannot talk or call anyone, but your parents only! I laughed so hard, they think they can control me even I am not in the community anymore.

More about me..................

2006-10-24T18:43:00.000-07:00

Hi you all, good evening! It is Tuesday, October 24. Don't you all have a good day? It is okay for me, got tired and took a good nap at work hehehe...... Ok enough about this... Let me talk about what I just started the other day. Oh the end, of children who were pretty severely abused by the elders. By the way, let me talk about the Corder's girls, Yohannah and Shosannah Corder, daughters of Tsehiyah and Salem. They are wonderful and great people that I admired so much! The family moved to Bellows Falls from Missouri because they needed help with the children. I have became very good friends with that family, especially Yohannah and we been working together in the Cafe. We have a lot of struggling in our lives with understanding and faith. I have admired Yohannah for her bravery and stand to her understanding what she is going through and tried so hard to please her parents and authority of the community. Not just that I am attracted to her but our friendship has been strong and stronger by the days we worked together. Really, to be honest, I miss her and have not be able to talk to her in 6 years after we left the community. I just had so much on my mind about the past that we, children all struggled with so much oppressing, judgments and unhappiness with the Twelve Tribes. I have clearly remember the night that Yohannah, Shoshannah and I and few other friends have secretly desired to leave the community and have new life. The girls were tough and brave and not afraid, I came to be stronger and assertive about myself and my decision about leaving the community. I left the community in October 10, 1999 that mean it is 7 years already. Oh my God! What?? I have already been out of the community for 7 years, it has not been on my thought till now that I just am writing this story about my experience living in the Twelve Tribes. The day I was planning to leave, I called my dearest friend, Bill Mehr and asked him to come get me because I decided in my life that it was time for me to get out of the community and have new life and to achieve my dreams. It was scarce about the decision to leave, but it was sure enough that I have several people, like Yohannah and Shoshannah and Bill to support me and we support each other. It was awesome feeling! Oh my eyes are in tears................... I already have packed and was putting things to hide behind somewhere. I was really ready, so determine to be ready but at same time scared. That day, as my biggest step for the real changes to happen, I was working in the cafe and I was in the middle of lunch rush and very busy with lunch rush at the cafe, there were pretty intense and crisis happened that Yohannah has already left and ran away but was pretty caught by her Dad. She was brought back to the community. She was in trouble and had a meeting, she confessed that I was about to leave. I was interrupted in middle of the lunch rush by an elder and was taken out of the lunch rush to have a talk with me. He asked "did you drink the blood of the cup?" I replied back with my face expression and said "I do not believe I have and I know what is right thing." He told me to go home and be in my room and lay in the bed. I was like, I am not a kid. I am a man! I was outraged with the way I was treated. I ended up went home and was locked up in my room. It was miserable feeling but I was determined to leave the community. More to come.. It should be more interesting the next time I writing........ Watch it out please and PLEASE WRITE THE COMMENTS for me, I want to hear from you all. Thanks and Good night...

Who am I?

2006-10-23T16:50:00.000-07:00

Want to know about me??? Yes? or No? Haha ok, there............ About me! Hmmm................ Why should I share about myself? Well, I am John Post, my parents are John and Elizabeth Post (Community name are Ayil and Drorah). They have been living in the Twelve Tribes for over 30 years and they are remain loyal to the community for many years. My parents have 3 boys and 4 girls that we all grew up in the community. Life as a family was beautiful and joy! And as we getting older, things have been changed! We were living in Island Pond, Vermont for many years and just grew up as a family and kids were growing up, just like normal traditional families are supposed to be, but under the community lifestyle is totally different than the American Tradition Family. As I became teenager, there were pretty intense going on in the Twelve Tribes, more criticize over parents handling the children who are just teenagers and their peer pressures and their selfishness over their desires of their lives as teenagers and what the Twelve Tribes could not provide for them. As I was a teenager, I was in a transition of rebellious because I am the only deaf person in the community where I have been ignored for so many years as isolation and no understanding of others about how to communicate with me in sign language and I was left out in homeschool as individual with one teacher and not with classmates as my age in one-room schoolhouse. It was miserable life experiences for me but I did not let it stop me because I was a good rebellious boy that fought so hard to prove how I deserve it and how I need to be understood about my feeling, my anger, my frustration and my desperate for communications. It has been ignored by the elders and leaders of the community. I have already expressed myself to my parents and my parents said they understand and do have the pain of feeling for me but they could not do it because they must ask the permission from elders for the decision making over my life and what is the best for me. I could not stand to this, it was just unbearable to live like this. I had growing up as whole teenager in the community and was trying so hard to please the authority and my parents. I grew to become more and more frustrating and I had questioned the authority and God. How I have been trained and given to be taught that I should serve Jesus Christ with all of my heart. I just could no longer go on and I was baptized and felt stronger and stronger in my faith and in God. Then, as I came to became older and older, in 19, 20th years old. I had became more doubts about the rules, authorities and religious beliefs in the Twelve Tribes. I no longer come to believe the life that God has been given to us. I came to question and prayed to God about the inner truth of my heart. I found that I was living in society in the Twelve Tribes where I was oppressed. I did not like it and I decided to take a big step in my life to leave the Twelve Tribes in 1999 because I was angry with the way I was mistreated, my family was mistreated, children were becoming mistreated, abused and all kind of misjudgment against the youth, young adults. I felt it was so wrong and overwhelming, parents no longer have control over the children and the elders and leaders became more mean and meaner toward the children and youth. I hated it so much that I cried with my eyes in tears felt sorry for the children younger than me, and I was going through the same things they have went through. I hated it so much! I felt that it was not God's way to treat us like this. More to come........................................

Introduction.......

2006-10-22T20:58:00.000-07:00

Hi, my name is John Post. I started this blog because I am interested to attract the people from the Twelve Tribes Community, former members and curiosity. I believe this blog will help everyone have different understandings what the experiences living in the Twelve Tribes are like. I want to have this as an opening discussions about different issues that we have faced in our lives from living in the Twelve Tribes positive and negative. I have wanted to start this for so many reasons. There is group in yahoo group for Ex-TT and it is dead and I thought this blog would be different and interesting because yahoo group is limited for everyone to share their perspectives.